I Hate That Hair...

I hate you Tyrone... I mean that... I really, Really, REALLY hate you. You probably don't even know my name. I'm the kid whose face you smashed in gym class last week during dodge ball. I was the one who was eventually going to get the courage to ask Melanie to the dance, before you did.. I'm the kid that sits behind you in math class, you know, the one who is always being yelled at for not understanding what's on the board?
Well Tyrone you jerk-face it's you and your stupid hair's fault. I can't see the board with your big dumb hair blocking every square inch of the board. You know how old and grouchy Mrs. Thompson is and she just won't move my desk away from you and your big stupid hair.
Even when you get up to sharpen your pencil I can see your hair move across the room like a blimp over the class. I could let my hair get that big but then I'd be stupid looking like you. The think what I hate most about your hair is that everyone else likes it. If you weren't captain of the stupid basketball team or the quarterback for the dumb football team everyone would see how stupid your giant hair is.
Well, Tyrone your gonna get it now, cause I found a lamp in my Grampa's basement. He said it can grant wishes if I'm super good to my Mom and brother. So I'm gonna be EXTRA, ULTRA, MEGA GOOD so I'll get my wish faster.
You know what I'm gonna wish for you poofy hair jerk? Im gonna wish for a B.H.E.R. -Big Hair Eating Robot! That's right a "BIG HAIR EATING ROBOT" just for you! As soon as I get my wish I'm gonna send it your way. I have it all planned out. I want it to have laser targeting, giant teeth, armor and big giant eyes that will record your every look as it EATS YOUR HAIR! I'm gonna sent it after that stupid hair in the middle of the night too, so no one will believe you when you tell them what happened. I will have the last laugh Tyrone, me and my Big Hair Eating Robot.